Attachment theory describes how you act and interact with romantic partners within relationships. There are four documented attachment styles, all formed at childhood from the child’s relationship with their primary giver caregiver.
In a 1970’s “a strange situation” study, children were left alone in a room with a stranger.
Children that fit into the insecure-avoidant classification did not react when the caregiver left. Instead of expressing any emotion at all, the child would play independently or interact with a stranger. When the caregiver returned to the room, the child would either totally ignore or minimally interact with the caregiver.
Psychologist, Mary Ainsworth, theorized by not showing any emotion, the child was instead masking his or her distress. She went on to say, the child felt it pointless to communicate their needs to their caregiver, as it seemingly had no effect. From childhood, these children learned that being attached or vulnerable leads to hurt and disappointment; a threat to his or her survival.
Those that grow up with an avoidant attachment style are fearful and suspicious of people and relationships. Romantic relationships in particular, make avoidants feel stifled and they are often described as cold and distant towards their partners, withholding love and…
